作词 : Rob Rokicki
作曲 : Rob Rokicki
LUKE: (Spoken) Come on, grab some ambrosia, and let the nectar flow
PERCY: (Spoken) Why is everyone scraping part of their plate into the fire? Is the food here really that bad?
LUKE: (Spoken) Offering to the gods. It's not enough that they're omnipotent and all-powerful, they need to feel appreciated.
To the gods!
ENSEMBLE: (Spoken) To the gods!
LUKE: Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the universe
ALL: Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the universe
LUKE: My dad is Hermes
He messengers things
You'll know his sign by his shoes with those wings
I'd wait by the phone, but the phone never rings
Oh no
(ENSEMBLE makes noises of agreement )
When your dad's a god, life can be tough
I met the guy once, and once was enough
(Spoken) Annabeth?
ANNABETH: My mom's Athena
She's smart and she's wise
She's sworn off gluten and she's sworn off guys
But if she came to camp, it'd be a surprise
Oh no (LUKE AND KATIE: Oh no )
Oh, and my stepmom, she hates me, and my dad works all day
So I left Virginia and I ran away
PERCY: (Spoken) Wait, is that true?
LUKE: (Spoken) Everybody!
ALL: Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the universe
Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the universe
LUKE: Alright, who's next?
KATIE: (Spoken) Oh! Okay, let me see...
(Sung) My mom's Demeter
Goddess of grain
She gets excited when it starts to rain
But planting and planting and planting's a pain
Oh no (ENSEMBLE: Oh no)
(Spoken) Right?
(Sung) For their sixteenth birthday, my friends got a car
I got a fern in some dumb mason jar
GROVER: (Spoken) Ooh, ooh! My turn!
(Sung) I'm a child of Pan
God of the wild
For those who love nature, they're often beguiled
He's not really my dad, but I'm sort of his child...
Oh no... (ENSEMBLE: Oh no)
He went for a hike to explore new frontiers
And no one has seen him for thousands of years
ALL: Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the universe
Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your folks run the universe
PERCY: (Spoken) Chiron! Who's your dad?
CHIRON: (Spoken) Oh, well
(Sung) My father is Kronos
Remember my lecture
He ate his children
LUKE: (Spoken) Chiron wins
(ENSEMBLE makes noises of agreement)
How about you Silena?
SILENA: The goddess of love
My mom's Aphrodite
She tries to be cool but mainly she's flighty
I'll bring home a boy, and she's there in her nightie (ENSEMBLE: Oh no)
(Spoken) It's so embarrassing, guys!
(Sung) I tried to seek help from even the fates
Cause she steals my mascara and all of my dates
LUKE: (Spoken) Alright Percy, it's your turn
PERCY: (Spoken) If I tried to sing, it'll probably cause an avalanche
LUKE: (Spoken) Oh, we're all friends here. Come on, give it a shot
PERCY: My mom was named Sally
She loved scary movies
And food that was blue
And-
KATIE: (Spoken) He's doing it wrong
SILENA: (Spoken) Yeah, who's your godly parent?
PERCY: (Spoken) Oh... I don't know
LUKE: (Spoken) It's alright. A lot of half-bloods never know their godly parent. Just give it a try
PERCY: So my dad is some god
That's great I guess...
Did he not want me? Or not want the stress?
Too bad he's the worst, and my life is a mess
Oh no (ENSEMBLE cheers)
I hope he shows even a trace
Cause I got some choice words to throw in his face!
ALL: Oh, things couldn't be worse
When your parents run the universe
Oh, things couldn't be worse
LUKE: But I don't care where our parents may be
As long as you are here with me
ALL: We don't care where our parents may be
As long as you are here with me
As long as you are here with me!
编辑于2023/12/24更新